Quarter Life Crisis

In a few weeks, I leave the teen world behind. In a few weeks, I'll be a twenty year old College Student. Time sure does fly. But in my twenty years of existence, what have I to show?I'm kinda ashamed to admit that I have never won a medal in my life. (go on, laugh you bastards!)

Back to my accomplishments, what have I done to make my parents proud of me? The things I'm about to post are regrets. Things that should be buried underground. But here I am, digging them up and putting them up in the internet where the world can see it. I don't mind. I'm the center of the universe. LOL.

My life is unfulfilled. There are things I wish I did, but never did. And Things I did, but wish I didn't. For example,

• I should not have stopped Tae Kwon Do. If I didn't, I could be a black belter now and I could be kicking ass or teaching.
•  I should not have quit the Basketball team at age 14. I could have gotten better. I could have met new people from other Roosevelts.
•  I should have joined the swimming team in College. Maybe then I'd have something to look forward to everyday. And a chance to be in my element. 
• I shouldn't have fallen in love. It brings nothing but pain and loneliness. People who enter my life in this way, are like birds perched on a branch. They stay for a while, and eventually leave the branch lonelier than ever. 
•  I should have spoken out. I should have spoken out in protest when they replaced me as the class representative in the declamation contest in High School. 
• I should have been first. But I was too busy doing other things, that someone got there before I had a chance to move. 

they say that we shouldn't regret the things in the past. Because they helped us become who we are. But what if, you're not satisfied with who you are? What if you hate who you are, and wish everyday you could turn back time? I know. It's pathetic.

They also say that if you're in pain, you're living in the past. If you're anxious, you're living in the future. but when you're content, you're in the present. But just where am I? I'm frustrated because of things in my past. I'm scared that the same will happen in the future. and in the present, I feel like... something's not right.. like something's missing....